Last week, I was especially rocked by the profound truth that "if you don’t love God, you can’t do anybody any ultimate good." This hasn't always been my struggle, perhaps because I selectively dole out care, avoiding those who would cause me to question the Christian creed to turn the other cheek. So the connection of my loving God allowing me to love others isn't at the forefront of my mind. But to love God, how could that be so tough, seeing how He's loved me despite my constant failings. But recently I've come to the end of my rope in loving each and every soul around me, be they family, friends, coworkers, and especially the unaware driver I have the unfortunate misfortune of almost hitting in the parking lot of Ranch 99.
God continued to knock my noggin through Piper's preaching that "The main reason we don’t love God and find it burdensome to love people is that our cravings are for the things of the world. They may be good things. They may be bad things. They may be material things. They may be relational. Whatever their form, they are not God. And when we crave them above God, they are idols. They replace love for God and love for people." I am not adverse to the premise that the way or the amount or the quality of my love for God is not sufficient. In fact, I would not be at a loss to delineate many of those cravings. And perhaps this is why I have been so frustrated in my so-called service of late, to the ones I love. Sourced through my own strength, my "giving to" and "doing for" efforts have not been well received. Even if the gift is something they would accept, they complain about why they don't need it, why they don't like it, and how it is simply all wrong. My attempts to serve garner a similar, demoralizing response. But God would see fit to seize this opportunity to pour out this seemingly illogical inspiration into my head, rationalizing away my paralysis-rendering discouragement. Of course I cannot do good without His good. Of course my love on its own is not what they need. Of course.
Let's hope this divinely fortuitous revelation can redirect my misguided path, not towards them, but towards Him.
